GREETINGS

Thanks a lot Swamiji for your earlier reply but i am still not able to get over it.My life was so beautiful till i got married,after that i am ina complete mess now.I just dont know how to get out of .I know what i am about to mention may seem vulgar and unhealthy but this is what i am seeing and even i am shattered .I had a completely normal life and a good govt job,i had a collegue with whom i had a great connectiona nd could share anything and with time we became more than friends and when my family came to know about it they harshly disapproved it and i was forced to get married to the guy they chose for me.Since then i felt like my life was a complete waste.My husband used to ignore me and never used to give me much importance and dint even allow me to take personal decisions like when to have a child and he said because his mother wanted him to have a child we must have a child soon.When i said we should wait till our relationship got better,he said you are 25 now and my mother i.e my mother in law had a baby at 18 so what is your problem now.when i tell him i am afraid of managing everthying at home ,he says my mother managed everything so well at such a young age and so you should also be able to do it.He brings his mums opinion into everything and compares a lot and sometimes its so bad that he even physically compares me with his mother. i actually once saw him staring at his own mums cleavage.This’s so creepy.He keeps trying to please his mother saying she is so young and beautiful and i have seen him telling his mum how soft her skin is when massaging her feet.When he meets his mum he has to keep hugging her tight.Whenever he seems so creepy my mind gets a lot of relief thinking about my cute colleague with whom i had a great deep connection emotionally and we used to make each other very happy .Please help me get out of this mess.Can i ever get peace ,happiness in life like before and will i ever be able to love a husband whom i find so creepy.I will be extremely grateful for your help.