1:36nihhatya dhārtarāṣṭrān naḥ kā prītiḥ syāj janārdanapāpam evāśrayed asmān hatvaitān ātatāyinaḥ1:37tasmān nārhā vayaṁ hantuṁ dhārtarāṣṭrān svabāndhavānsvajanaṁ hi kathaṁ hatvā sukhinaḥ syāma mādhava In Śloka 36 and 37, Arjuna
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Dear swamiji, Please guide me on the following matter.This is regarding my sis in law.she was married 5 years back.the guy was her own choice but of our caste. within a year they came to know that he had a serious disease and by that time she was 5 months pregnant. when the kid was 1.5 years old her husband passed away.that time my husband and his father advised her to stay back in her own home..but she was not ready and came along with us.within six months she got a job and as soon as she joined the job she fell engaged with her colleague who was ready to accept her along with kid..both my hus and his father opposed because the guy was of different caste and also younger to her.but she was so stubborn that she wouldn’t leave that relation.guy’s parents also didn’t agree to it. finally my hus and his father stoped talking to her just like ‘do whaterver you want’ policy. then she started making them feel that she was going for a register marriage. but even after 2 years neither she has married to him nor left the relation.her mother is the only one who’s supporting her. meanwhile my husband came up with a proposal for her but her mother didn’t even inform her about that.swamiji,why all are behaving like this in my house..i feel that she and her friend are not daring to get married and lead a life..my question is then why she’s simply wasting her time and ours as well?what can i do to solve this problem and get her n her kid settled with a new life as soon as possible?
Posted by B.s on April 11, 2016
Your sister-in-law is someone who has experienced a terrible loss early in her life. I really congratulate her for finding a job quickly to support herself and her child. What she needs from all of you family members is understanding and support instead of trying to dictate her life. She is now with someone who whole heartedly accepted her and her kid. Despite all the differences you see they are able to find comfort in each other. How can you ask her to now live with someone else your husband found ? As the daughter-in-law of the house, I want you to step up and be compassionate. Talk to her with love and find out what she wants to do with her life. As a family, give up your petty ego and help her to live her life. Much as you all find fault with her, have you really cared for her when she was in pain? What a single mother needs from her family is support by all means and not rules. Let her life bloom again. There is no urgency to get her settled. Give her time, she will find out what is best for her and her child. Just relax, enjoy your life and start to love her. Everything will fall in place. Hari Om.
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