GREETINGS

Swamiji:

Let me congratulate you for writing to me on this and wanting to change your behavior in a way that your peers appreciate you. This is not a situation to feel upset, but a God given opportunity to improve. There is a saying, “to test a man’s character, give him power”. Meaning, how well you behave in a position of authority, is the true test of your character. Your subordinates and wife feel you are negative, while people at your level admire you. Which means, you behave well with people who are at your level, but are not able to handle your position of authority properly.  A man with power, should be utmost compassionate. Compassion happens only if you can see things through the other person’s perspective. Just do two things for now…

1. Instead of instructing your wife or colleagues on what to do, listen to their input on how they want a situation handled. Add your suggestions, and allow them to perform with your guidance. Remove the word “NO” from your vocabulary and try to facilitate everything they want on your end.

2. A good boss is not one who rules, but one who leads by example. Every morning think what is one little thing you can do, which your subordinates or wife will appreciate, however small that may be. May be it is just a smiling face, or a smooth tone of your voice. May be it is saying “its ok, try again” when someone makes a mistake or asking “if you need help”…..and so on.  Let them feel you care. Write back to me in two weeks. You became a senior person at work because you are capable. You are equally capable to make others say, “He is gem of a guy”. My blessings are with you. Hari Om.